<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>Restless Nights by FiresFromOurHearts</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24160024">Restless Nights</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/FiresFromOurHearts/pseuds/FiresFromOurHearts'>FiresFromOurHearts</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Small Harry Potter Things [36]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>(implied) - Freeform, And you can try to pry that away from my cold dead hands, Angst, Comfort, Friendship, Gen, Healing, In a way, Male-Female Friendship, Maybe - Freeform, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, QPR Seamus and Dean, Queerplatonic Relationships, Recovery, and you will lose, but more</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-05-13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-02 20:36:08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>707</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24160024</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/FiresFromOurHearts/pseuds/FiresFromOurHearts</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>The aftermath is sometimes harder than the war itself. Seamus wanders the castle grounds and knows he's never alone. It's enough.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Seamus Finnigan &amp; Dean Thomas</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Small Harry Potter Things [36]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/719196</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Restless Nights</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The halls of Hogwarts often feel like they should be tense, full of hushed danger and wary faces. They’re not and Seamus is always grateful for that, grateful down to his very bones, so grateful that sometimes he doesn’t quite think he can explain how glad he is for the changes. But he’d gotten used to it. In the sad way that he never should have.</p>
<p>Now it feels strange to walk without that tension and stress snaking its way up his back. He’s caught between floating away and stressing that there’s nothing to stress over. The awful, heavy burden of war and danger has been taken from his shoulders; removed, and yet he doesn’t know any longer how to cope without it.</p>
<p>He knows he’s not alone in that. There are others struggling—most of them are, to be honest. They struggle in different ways, trying to find ways to cope and moving on when things don’t help.</p>
<p>Seamus would’ve thought living after the war’s over was easier, but he’s starting to learn that it’s the hardest thing that he would ever do. Paranoia tingles at his fingertips like sparks of magic. Loud footsteps from behind him send him whirling around, wand at the ready to attack. Comfort is difficult when it makes your skin crawl because you’re out in the open and there’s no refugee nearby.</p>
<p>The worst of it, without a doubt, is the sleeping troubles. When they fought every day, feared for their own safety and others’ lives, they were exhausted when they put their heads down to rest, instantly falling asleep more often than not. He’s not that tired now. Sometimes he sleeps and doesn’t remember his dreams, but more often than not, he does. He doesn’t sleep for long either, and the exhaustion follows him through the day, tugging at his heels, but he still can’t rest.</p>
<p>The restlessness has recently sent him stalking Hogwarts’ hallways at night. It’s been only a month since that last, final battle and Seamus has yet to leave Hogwarts. The option had been there, always has been, but leaving Hogwarts feels too dangerous—he feels like he needs to be here, to keep defending the castle, even though he knows that things are safe. Technically.</p>
<p>He steers clear of the few other people he spots; familiar faces but no one he’s really close to. His feet take him on a wandering path that leads up onto the castle’s battlements. Despite the chilly night, Seamus can’t bring himself to mind even as his breath rises in a white mist.</p>
<p>As he slowly wanders down the battlement looking towards the Forbidden Forest, he finds someone who he hadn’t expected to see. One of the few people he’s willing to reach out to at night when secrets seem to press against his lips.</p>
<p>Stepping closer to the wall, he glances at Dean. “Hey,” he says, the word breathed out softly and almost lost in the silence surrounding them.</p>
<p>“Hey,” Dean echoes, closing the distance between them so they lean shoulder to shoulder. Seamus breathes out shakily, the warmth sinking into his bones, shoulders relaxing. It’s easier when someone has your back—to simply <em>be</em>. And Dean always has his back, even when they were apart.</p>
<p>They don’t speak, not really. Seamus doesn’t ask if Dean can’t sleep, he already knows the answer. He doesn’t ask why Dean’s watching the Forbidden Forest either, they’ve spoken about that at length to; spoken about how forests are both safety and danger to Dean. Dean doesn’t ask why he’s not sleeping either. They know all they need to know.</p>
<p>Seamus just keeps breathing, leaning against Dean, and reminds himself that he’s alive. There are no cures for this, no quick fixes for the aftermath. Maybe he doesn’t need to be here, but he wants to be here.</p>
<p>In time, he’s certain, he’ll be able to walk without fear and without flinching. In time, he won’t miss the certain weight of war on his shoulders. In time, he’ll sleep through the night more often than he doesn’t.</p>
<p>But that’s in the future, possibly years away. So for now he doesn’t sleep, but keeps watch with Dean, and breathes until night fades into morning.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Probably the shortest thing I've really ever written, but I'm kinda happy with it. I just wanted it done and I wanted something quiet and soft. The prompt for this was write about someone who can't sleep. So you've got Seamus, who's probably suffering from PTSD, wandering around to waste the night away. And Dean who's suffering too, and their friendship. Ironically, their friendship probably makes up a small bit of this section and yet felt like the most important bit to me.</p>
<p>Hope you're all doing well.</p></blockquote></div></div>
</body>
</html>